and totally rock at life

When I was younger I thought self-love was allowing myself to have a long hot bath, a glass of wine, or a lunch out with friends. All these things bring me joy, but they’re not the things that are making me totally and deeply love and accept myself. They’re not showing me how to say no, when I mean no, or how to adore the person in the mirror and how she looks, they’re not encouraging me to show up, stand out and be me.

Self-love is an undercurrent.

Self-Love is an underlying current in your body, mind and soul, it’s the very essence of who you are and how you do things. Love is the one true energy that is present in life, it is what we are here for, to love and be loved, to give and receive, to learn about and receive love.

If you don’t have self-love..

A person who does not have self-love and does not show up every day to work on it, will allow themselves to be treated poorly, to be used, to be ignored, they’ll put others needs before their own, burnout, feel exhausted, overthink, doubt themselves, say no when they want to say yes and say yes when they want to say no. They’ll have loose boundaries, overeat, snack, put off things until tomorrow, not look after their health and happiness and will feel unfulfilled, unsatisfied and resentful.

If you do have self-love..

A person who knows self-love, looks in the mirror, winks and says “hello gorgeous,” she walks with confidence, she speaks her truth, she says yes to things that excite her, she says no to people and things that feel heavy and out of alignment, she listen to her intuition and trusts herself. A person with self-love will have energy, motivation and focus. They’ll have great relationships built on trust and respect, they’ll look after their body, be healthy and relaxed. They feel satisfied and fulfilled, and are just as comfortable on their own as they are in group or crowd.

Self-love is a state of mind, as well as daily action, it might look different for people, and it might change over time. Here are five ways you can start to cultivate and experience self-love. I also have a 5-day self-love series that I created, with a daily exercise to increase self-love and that wonderful undercurrent of energy.

Strengthen your self-love muscle everyday but taking inspired action. You wouldn’t go a day without brushing your teeth and hair, so don’t go a day without cultivating self-love. You’ll never regret looking in the mirror and saying “I love you.” here are five other ways you can get started with self-love today.

5 ways you can cultivate and experience self-love.

#1 Gratitude for yourself, moisturise your body daily and say thank you, I love you, to each and every body part. Thank you toes, I love you. Thank you feet, I love you. Thank you ankle, I love you.
–You can add in other gratitude practices, like a journal or sharing with friends, saying thank you for all the lovely things in life, thank you shower, thank you towel, thank you kettle, thank you tea cup etc

#2 Start and end the day with a mantra, choose something to say to yourself to feel good and set the energy. “all of life comes to me with ease, joy and glory” Is the Access Consciousness Mantra, you can choose one that sounds great to you. “I am loving and lovable, I live by my own rules”

#3 Accept where you are, you can’t get where you’re going unless you’re where you are right now. Instead of telling yourself, “I should” be earning this much, have lost this much weight, be feeling happier, be grateful for ….., spending more time, be more organised, or any of the other “shoulds” you can give yourself a hard time for, try accepting where you are and thinking about what you’d like to change and how you can do that. It’s ok to be where you are right now, and it’s ok to change. Change can be as fast or as slow as you like. You’re worth it, love yourself and making changes will be so much easier.

#4 Focus on what you want to feel and believe about yourself. What you focus on grows, your thoughts become your reality, so take the time each day to think about your goals. Don’t skip this step, you might think, you know your goals and your heading towards them, but you need to consciously focus on them each day. Write down in a journal your goals for how you want to look, act, be, feel, do each day. Think about them and if you can visualize them each night before sleep. Think about those goals when your energy and vibration is high, like when you’re exercising or having an orgasm. Get your energy behind them, and don’t stop focusing and believing until it’s here.

#5 Return to sender. Stop buying into those feelings and thoughts that don’t serve you. 90% of those feelings and thoughts aren’t yours. You picked them up from somewhere, a parent, sibling, teacher, tv, movies, books, songs and more. When you hear yourself judging, criticising, putting yourself down, buying into the negative thoughts, beliefs and feelings, Say to yourself “Is this mine?” If it feels lighter, then it’s not yours, say to yourself “Return to Sender with consciousness attached” and send that stuff back. You don’t need it, You don’t want it, send it back.

There you go, 5 ways to create more self-love starting today. If you’d like more on self-love you can download the 5-day Self-Love series here. If you need to deep dive on this and have someone to help you through it all, then contact me for more ways on how we can work together.

The more people who embody love, the better this world will be. I want to grow my self-love every day so that I can role model that to my son, my clients and friends. I want my self-love to be a strong and confident foundation on which to build rocking relationships and the ultimate intimate relationship.

You deserve to feel amazing..

Self-love is more than daily actions, it’s an underlying belief in yourself and your worthiness, for a great and wonderful life. You deserve that, don’t you?